"We must remember that, before we are a light to our neighbors and to the world, we are first a light to the home. Unless we are a light to one another -- to our families and to the body of believers to which we belong -- we will not shine at all. The light that is in us will turn to darkness. If we are to avoid the futility which comes when the blind lead the blind, if we are truly to walk in the with one another, we must first be broken.
There is a popular expression among the Revival Fellowship that describes this disposition in the life of an individual. The Ugandan word is Okumenyeka. There is no word just like it in English. It is a "broken" individual. To be broken is to have no pride, for where there is pride, there is no confession and no forgiveness. To heal a broken relationship , one must be broken; one must be willing to "give in;" one must not find his or her identity in always being in the right.
When Jesus fed the five thousand, he took five loaves of bread, blessed them, broke them, and gave them to the disciples to give away (Matthew 14:19). One brother of the Revival read this verse and then looked at me. "Until God breaks your will, he will never use you," he said. "You will only remain a nice loaf of bread." What Jesus did in feeding the multitude was very symbolic of what was going to happen to his body. To his own disciples he said, "This is my body which is broken for you.'
Unless we are broken, we are of no use to God. And unless we are broken, we are of no use to the community of believers of which we are a part. Hardly any of us can go to his own Christian community and say, "This is my body which is broken for you. I am laying all my professional skills, abilities, and economic resources at your disposal. Take them and use them as you see fit." We cannot say this, because we are not broken. We are too proud to give our lives to people who are not perfect. We want to find the perfect person and the perfect community, but we never find them. So, like Judas, we make only a partial commitment to the body of believers to which we belong , and we find our identity in our rebellion from them." "Walking in the Light" by F. Kefa Sempangi
The Lord is definitely teaching me a ton about being broken before the throne of Grace. Being broken isn't something we think we should resist, but embrace.
"But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me." {2 Corinthians 12:9}
The end of self brings so much room for the Lord to have His way. That is where real strength comes from, understanding we are weak before Him and that it is only through Him we are able to accomplish anything of worth. It is such a beautiful thing the Lord calls us to. Easy? Absolutely not. But Beautiful? Oh my goodness, yes. How sweet the Lord is!
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